5/14 Up $3245
I rule the school. I put the entire remaining bankroll on the table and win $1400 pretty quickly. Writing this a week later, I don't remember a single hand from the beginning part of this session, so I guess I had nothing difficult come up, and that I made no mistakes. I leave the casino and drive to San Diego to hang out with a rock band I'm friends with who were opening for Modest Mouse. Great time, great people, and I drive the two hours back from SD happy as a clam... As for the first time hanging out with them they're way happy about that things are finally going their way. I start thinking about gambling and my nature of a gambler, and after running this label, and putting $15k into a variety of cockamamie bands, it makes sense that it doesn't phase me to play poker for these stakes. Bukowski had a good quote: “not all of us are gamblers and those who aren't don't matter.” I'm starting to think of a gambler as anyone who has to rely on their own output for their income, artists, business owners, anyone not on salary.
Anyway, I come back to the casino, and put $2k on the table (no longer the whole bankroll..) There's this utter maniac on the table with like $10k in front of him at this point. Odd looking fellow, I can't figure out what his nationality is... White hair, well groomed beard, thin, somewhere in middle age, although I can't tell if he's 40 or 60, and has clear braces on his teeth. I see him playing quite a few hands, and winning them all on completely insane draws. The table is kind of going nuts, but most of them are decent enough players and know how to do the right thing. Which is be very vocal in reinforcing this behavior: telling him how amazing he is, how he can't miss... as opposed to “you suck, I will gut you, you lucky son of a bitch.” And it appears that he's dumb enough to actually believe this hype, and he keeps putting his money in so fucking bad and getting there. By the reaction of the table, and his stack, it looks like he's been running hot for a few hours. He's also very aggressive, and I am fortunate that he's sitting directly to my right.
Eventually I get QQ. Braces raises to $100, I make it $400. Folds around to Braces, who says “well, I have a big pair, so I have to call.” Flop = 88J. He checks, I give a speech of “well, if you have jacks, I guess you win. I'm all in.” And he turns his Jacks over and calls. Wow, that was so stupid of me, his speech should have let me know that he either has AA, KK, or JJ... The only only hand I'm beating is TT. But, who calls TT “a big pair?” I should have thought longer on this, but I was so psyched to get into a big pot with him with queens that I couldn't think of folding.
Well, so, I put the whole bankroll on the table again. And I just sit, and I'm really getting depressed here, thinking about how after winning earlier I'm down again, and the fact that my flight leaves the night. I'm counting my money and realizing that if I go home now I'm coming back with a $1k loss, and it cost me about $1k to get and stay here. It's really upsetting, but, I do my best to meditate, calm down, meditate, don't go on tilt, there are no cosmic forces aligning against me, there are only the forces of variance, and my own stupidity. And as I meditate, I look around and find that this table is amazing. Not only is Braces doing what he's been doing, and this young sunglasses punk at the other end of the table is also an aggressive donkey. Bluffing the shit out of everyone, he's up, he's down, he's as active as a cartoon, he's as loud as a drunk. This one hand is amazing.. Quiet Asian man on the left of me keeps betting into him with a Q high board and 2 clubs out there. He's taking his time, making pot sized bets that Punk keeps calling. The turn and river both blank, and Quiet Asian goes all in for like $3k. Punk has him covered, thinks for awhile, “you trying to bluff me? You miss your flush? You trying to bluff me???” Punk is getting really pissed off as Quiet Asian says nothing. Punk keeps going on about “you trying to bluff ME?” Asian says nothing. Punk calls... Asian mucks!! Punk has QJ!!!! one pair, J kicker!!! Punk stands up, pounds on the table, points at Asian's stack, and shouts “Gimme that money!! I knew you didn't have that flush!!! GIMMIE THAT MONEY!!!” Asian turns white, and leaves silently.
Eventually I flop a K high flush draw in late position on a T64 flop. SB bets $200, called by Financier. Financier seems to be a good player, I was talking to him about the business he owns, which provides small loans to individuals for cars and homes, nice guy, and a pretty good player from what I can see. I have like $1500 in front of me at this point,and I realize that the table is hyper aggressive now, and I know that any reasonable bet will be called probably by both of them. So I make an unreasonable bet, and go all in. SB folds, Financier is like “flush draw? Are you on a draw?” He shows AT, and folds. My side of the table is like “set of 4's or 6's?” I shrug and smile, and let them believe it, the other side of the table is sure I have a flush draw.
Next hand I have KQ. Flop = KXX, 2 spades. Braces bets, I call. Turn = Q of not spades. Braces bets again, I do my best to take some time with it, show some hesitation to hopefully draw him in. I eventually raise to $1k. He asks how much I have left, I have $600 left. He thinks for awhile, and puts me all in. I call quickly.. River = blank. Financier says “two pair is very good.” Nice read, I show, take the pot, now have $1600 profit from this part of the session. Braces says that he had spades, and figured that he should put the money in because if the last spade came then he wouldn't get called on the bet.. Hmm... let's look at the math here.. 4/1 to hit his flush. I think the pot is $800 before I go all in. So, yeah, this would have been good if he'd done it on the flop, where he'd be 2/1, but on the turn is really bad.
Anyway, I'm really wanting to play the entire night with Braces, because I know the $8k that he has left is fully in play on every hand. But, I'm a bit nervous at having $6k on the table, and I'm a bit tired. So I go home, happy with a nice win on the day.
5/15 Up $2390
When I get back the next day at like 3:00, Financier is still there from the night before! Unshaven, bleary eyes, he'd been playing for like 30 hours straight. When I'd left him last night he had somewhere around $2k in front of him, and he now has about $15k. Turns out that Braces threw away every dime he had on that table, and Financier managed to take a good bit of it a few hours after I left, and just went off to the races from there.
Ok, so $2k on the table. Sit for awhile, get good grounding, lose a few hundred on a couple reasonable calls, and have $1600 in front of me. I get QQ under the gun, make it $100, Financier and one other callers. Flop = T22, two clubs. Bet $300. Call, call. Turn = Blank. If I'd thought about it for a second I'd know I'm beat by at least one of these guys, but I don't think too hard, and make up some fantasy about how they either have a lone T, or are on clubs. So I go all in for the $1200 or so I have in front of me. Financier goes all in over the top of that. I don't even blink, I knew I was beat, and it's obvious now, I just get a wave of depression over me, and start to dig in my pocket for the rest of my money. It's obvious he has T's full. My agony is only prolonged as dude at the other end of the table is thinking and thinking, and eventually calls also... I was right, Financier has T's full, other dude has A222, I come in 3rd when the river blanks.
I'm pissed again, just so fucking angry at myself that on the last day, like 5 hours until I have to drive directly to the airport that I would so something so fucking dumb. I might have been on tilt, but there was really no option but for me to keep playing at this point. And I do, and I force myself to get off tilt, and I do, and I get in the zone. And I mean the zone. I think terrifying thought of having to come back with little to no profit did it to me. To have to update this blog, and tell everyone how stupid I played did it to me.
This guy who'd been playing with Financier since late last night, is way on tilt. Everyone is talking what a good player he is, and how odd it is to see him down so much. He'd been bluffing a lot, he's just bluffed me out of a small pot actually, so I felt ok to call his $100 with AT. Flop = XXT. I bet $200, he goes through a long hesitation, and goes all in for $800. The instant after the words “all in” are out of his mouth the word “call” is out of mine. He asks, “you called so quick. I guess you have a set.” “No set. Do I need one?” He's silent, turns his look towards the dealer putting out blanks. With a pensive and anxious look, he stares at me waiting, I say “I called you.” He turns to a depressed hangdog look, can't talk, and looks at the felt. So I show him the AT, to which he says “that's good.” He gets up from the table immediately. I can't help a satisfied smile. A Bobby Fisher quote crosses my mind, “I like the moment when I break a man's ego.”
With a pair of 5's... The passive tight Asian with KK over my QQ from a few days ago calls this loose aggressive dude in early position. Flop = 567. Wow, set.. Somewhat dangerous board, but yeah, set, money is mine. Aggressive dude bets $250, and I'm thinking how I'll just call him and let him keep betting at me. But... Asian is thinking for long time, no expression, making me nervous. He raises to $600. Wow... I show my cards to no one, and fold instantly. As Asian is taking the pot in, I tell him I had a set of 5. He's like “really? I had set of 6's.” His reaction was so shocked, that I know that he wasn't putting me on. He kept asking why I folded, I mention the QQ/KK hand, and say “I don't mess around with you anymore.”
I sit and do nothing for a long long while. With two black 4's, I call Financier's $80 with a few others in the pot. Flop = 88T. I check, Financier checks, everyone checks, check please! Heh, sorry... Turn = 3 (red). I think “wow, wouldn't that have been great if it were a red 4?” Then I think “well, why don't I just play like it was,” and check again. Financier bets $200. Folds around to me. I make it $500. He thinks for a long time and calls. River = blank. I think for a while, know that he's good enough to fold any hand without an 8. I take some breaths, and put out a $1200 bet, which isn't quite all in for me, but it might as well be. He thinks and thinks, shows me a T, and mucks.
Sit for awhile, play tight, win some small hands, happy with the small profit. I'm about ready to leave, when I get 99 on the button. Limp pot, no reason to raise, so I limp too. Flop = 964. Early position dude, who'd just sat down raises to $100. Folded around to me. I take a lot of time. A whole lot of time, I think what would someone with 78 do here. I finally ask the dealer “how much is that?... ok, I call.” Turn = blank. I'm wondering if he's buying the straight draw. So, he bets again, $300 this time. I take some breaths, and take a really really long time here. Finally, I decide that someone with 78 would just call. River = 4, 9's full! Wheeee! He checks, which surprises me, but I know he doesn't have quad 4's from this. So I put him on exactly the hand he has. I think and think, and eventually put out $1500. Calls quickly, and immediately turns his 6's full over, saying “I have a boat.” “No good.” Show the 9's take the pot.
The whole table goes insane, Financier says “Excellently played. By both of you.” That was nice to hear, what was really nice to hear was the Mexican donkey who cracked me with T7 a few days ago say as a joke, “I knew exactly what you have. So, you never hurt me.” Then a few hands later, as my flush beat his set for a modest pot he says “you scare me today. I beat you all time before.”
I wish I could play this good all the time. I leave soon after, drive to the airport, and wish I were not leaving. Satisfied with the trip, but feeling that my small, $4700 profit was more of an escape from disaster, rather than a real success. I made too many mistakes, and I can't afford mistakes, in this business you need the money to weather the inevitable shit storms.
