Up $680... lessons on poker etiquette

Write some in the blog, and then promise to myself of how I'm going to play more patient. I get there and it all kind of goes out the window. I sit down to a cramped table in between the dealer and the Staker. Staker has his chips in a rack in my space, and I politely ask him to move to give me some space, to which he begrudgingly does, and gives me an annoyed “is that ok?” To which I do my best to politely thank him.

On my first big hand I raise with KQ, Staker calls. Flop = KJT, I bet again, he calls. Turn = X. I check, he bets, I call. I only have $600 or so left in front of me after this. The river is also a blank, and he puts me all in. I insta-call him, to which he says “I've got nothing.” I turn over the cards, don't look at him. It takes him a long time to fold, at which point I've kind of got the feeling that he's slow rolling me, but he isn't and he mucks. I guess he was just pissed that I'd give him such little respect to call him on a hand like that. I say nothing, I don't look at him, he says nothing to me. I am not sure why this guy hates me so much. He's so friendly and talkative with everyone else at the table, with the entire staff of the casino, and when ever I say anything in his conversation, I get ignored. But, whatever, I've resolved to avoid engaging him in any manner that I don't have to, but also to go out of my way to be nothing but polite to him.

My next big hand I have 88, and I try to make a couple superstar calls on this tight asian dude, on a board of like 442 or something, but he has 99, which I don't realize until I've given him $1800. Very very stupid. I had no reason to be making these calls on him. I'd seen him play nothing but good cards in the few times I've played with him, and so there was no reason. My other mistake in this hand was not going all in on the river. He was obviously not happy with me raising, and to not take advantage of this was also a very bad play, I mean, if I'm going to play these cards, I should play the cards. So I'm back to even. I try to bluff at a few pots, it doesn't work out, I can't hit a hand.

The UFC is on in the bar, and I take about an hour break to watch that. Good fight, I was among the minority who wanted to see Couture get his 44 year old ass pounded. Actually I was sure that he would, and this makes me really glad that I don't bet on sports.

So I get back to the table, and lose a few hundred more on a couple small bluffs and reasonable calls. This kid directly to my right I've seen limp in early position and make a huge re-raise like maybe three or four times. So, I get JJ, he limps, I raise to $120, he makes it $320, I go all in. He calls.. with KK.. Shite. Well, he only had $900 or so, and so, I'm still alive, with $600 on the table. Down from a $2500 buy in. I have $5k in my pocket that I'm really tempted to put on the table, but I get a hold of myself, and stick to the $2500 limit that I'd promised myself. I realize that I'm pissed at myself in throwing away another big early profit. So, I resolve to torture myself a bit, and see how tight and patient I can play with the $600. Two hands later I get TT in the small blind. It's straddled, and there are a bunch of callers, and I'm getting ready to make a huge raise and take the pot. But, this pretty tight and good player with like $10k makes it $200 on the button. And I think for a second that he might be making a move, he's made some before, but, I decide that playing good means to throw hands like this away. And I do. He doesn't show or comment, but I'm happy with this play, and I think that quite a few players in this spot would have thrown all their money in.

So, I sit, and eventually pick up $300 with AK. Bet $100 pre flop, three callers, and shove the last $400 in on the J high flop. The dudes I was in the hand with were all good and tight, I was nervous about someone having a J, but no one called. I realized then who was actually paying attention to my game, and how little I was playing for the past hour, and who wasn't.

The big WPT thing has brought a lot of these 22 year old tournament players out. And they are all horrible. Horrible people to play with, and horrible at poker. They all have dollar signs in their eyes, and their brand of all in stupidity, of playing every pot like their life depends on it, is the brand that will win one of these things. But, in the cash games, if someone goes all in on you, you really need to be able to throw away aces a lot of the time. Anyway, one of these kids sit down to my left.

This hair lip, who I don't dislike, but he only has like $400, and I'd like to get him off the table, so we can get some more money on it. Anyway, me and three others call a bet from him, I have 55, and flop a set. Check to him, he bets, everyone else folds, I put him all in. He can't resist calling, and he busts and leaves. Yay. But, it's as though this kid re-spawns himself in the form of three other tournament players, who are ten times douchier than he was. These kids sitting directly to my left have no concept of poker etiquette, taking forever with every decision they make, frequently speculating loudly about hands they're not even playing in. It's infuriating, I try to get them to shut up a few times, politely, but then eventually I've kind of just had it.

This kid directly to my left got bluffed out on his very first hand for a big pot, and the kid just couldn't let it go. And for the next two hours I have to hear him whine about it. At first I was pretty nice to him, saying something like “man, you can either let it go, or go crazy with tilt.” But, being stuck a grand my patience started to really wear thin, as not only do I have to listen to him whine, but these kids taking for-fucking-ever on every decision. Finally, I snapped on this hand: another tournament looking kid, who actually knew how to not piss people off, makes a $200 raise, to which the kid to my left calls, and this other tournament kid goes all in for $400 more. Both kids call, when they realize it can't be re-raised. Flop is all low. Raiser makes it $600, and as soon as he raises I call the floor over, when the floor gets there, I call clock on the kid. To which he and his buddy spaz out on me. “It's only been like thirty seconds! What's your problem?” Blah blah. Ok, so, no time, but he's still thinking and thinking, and I try to call the floor back and call time on him again, to which he spazzes out on me again. Ok, so no time is called again. Eventually the kid calls. Turn is another low card, raiser makes a big raise and the kid goes all in. The raiser is contemplating his decision, when the kid's buddy says something like “Aahhh ha! I knew you had Ace King!!!” To which I start cursing him “shut the fuck up. This is a $4k pot.” To which he says “Really 'shut the fuck up?'” Me: “Are you serious? One player per hand, this is a huge pot, shut your fucking mouth.” Anyway, raiser calls with TT, kid had 88. Retarded. Kid buys back in for $2k though, which makes me happy.

As the cards are being dealt for the next hand, kid says to me. “Just so you know, I'm not chopping with you anymore.” Me: “You're still gonna chop with your buddy?” Kid: “Yeah, or whoever sits next to me, but not you. That was bullshit calling time on me.” A few hands later he raises to $130, that me and like 4 others also smelling his tilt, call. I have 55, and I'm thinking how amazing it would be to flop a set on his ass. And I do, with a K52 flop. It's checked to Kid, who bets $300, one caller, and I go all in for the $1090 I have in front of me. He's looking at me, “Did you flop a set? Pocket fives or twos?” I say nothing, I know that if I'm silent, and don't look at him, it'll just make him mad. His buddy says something like “you should call time now.” Nothing, nothing, nothing. He calls eventually. I'm like “good call, yeah good call.” Turn and river dealt.. “Yeah, good call, good call.... I mean, for me!!!” Turn over the set, he looks like he wants to puke. As I'm taking the pot in I say “Hey! Thanks for the money!” He says nothing, and sits there looking like someone just shot his dog. His friend tries to get him to take a break, but he refuses. I know I have him on crazy tilt, but it's 2AM, and I'm tired and I don't think I have the energy to battle with him, so I leave.

This is the great thing about the difference between playing in a casino and in home games, the chance to really be an asshole. I mean, I had this kid on such tilt, that there was no way that he could make any right decisions after that. I drive away laughing my head off, and blasting this Chavez song .